March 10, 2018 at 4:49 pm #128676
chris80hdParticipantMarch 10, 2018 at 4:49 pmPost count: 5
My name is Chris, and I wanted to share my experience thus far, and to also give some insight (if you are a parent with a child who may be ADHD) into the perspective of a child. I am now, obviously, an adult, but insight can sometimes be valuable. Take it for what it’s worth, and thank you for reading 🙂
I was diagnosed with ADHD at a young age. The course of treatment was to start taking Ritalin, at small doses, and gradually work my way up, while my family and school teachers would provide feedback of the effect the medication had on me. Both the teachers, and my family, reported back that the highest dosage seemed most effective.
Months went by, and years, and I was slowly working my way into a depressive state in which I was not aware, and no longer cared for who I was. My family was not aware at this point that I was cutting myself, or that I was contemplating if life really had a meaning. I was subdued, and no longer hyperactive, to which my family thought was miraculous. You see, the previous years of attempting to deal with a strong willed, hyperactive, constantly underachieving, little boy who would run circles around everyone and everything lead to this moment. They we’re willing to do anything to get some kind of reprieve, even severely overmedicate me.
At a certain point,once reaching high school, I decided, on my own, to stop taking medication. My parents were outraged, but regardless, refused to take it, and in doing so received a moment of clarity… Followed by 10 years of attempting to self medicate. It was the secondary onset of depression and anxiety that I attempted to treat, through self medicating (drinking, drugs) and eventually through more ideal situations with doctors and psychologists. I was being told at this point that my initial diagnosis of ADHD was probably incorrect (due to my experience with Ritalin), and that General Anxiety was most likely the cause if my ills.
Then I got married, had a few children of my own. Stoped trying to treat my depression, went back to self medicating using alcohol. Ended up getting divorced, worked my way out if the ensuing despair, and started hyperfocusing on work, excelling as a data analyst.
My children, however (son Wes, daughter Hailey), having been genetically predisposed to all sorts of wonderful cognitive and learning disabilities between myself and their mother, were both having an abysmal time trying to succeed in school. Now I, their father, having been through to process of having my parents extremely overmedicate me in seeking relief for themselves rather then help for their troubled child, made a pact with myself before God, in which there would be NO WAY I’d let my children suffer the same fate.. No way, no how.
The problem with that? My son wasn’t making friends, rather he was coming home everyday asking why everyone was smarter than him, and why nobody liked him. My daughter, though having no trouble making friends, couldn’t get a single piece of school work done, struggled immensely with reading, and would run the halls at school making teachers chase her.
Both children were given the labels “sweet, kind,but troubled.” And here I was, feet planted firmly in the ground, unrelenting, unwavering in my fight against medicating my children.
This would all change, however, when my son (the eldest) would be diagnosed with ASD, and proceed to beg me to let him try antidepressants, to relieve some of the pain associated with his ailments. At this point I had to relent, I’m not going to deny my son the opportunity to responsibly try and get help. So we started him on Zoloft, along with group therapy, and school assistance. It was just weeks before I saw marked improvement in both his demeanor, and his social life. Id finally met my son. I don’t contribute it to the medication totally, no. Rather it was the awareness that he needed help, he needed to be understood by both his family and teachers. In doing this, we are able to give him the help he deserves.
Very recently my daughter was diagnosed with ADHD. This brought back painful memories for me, but also reminded me that I too, was onced diagnosed, and maybe it was time that I sought treatment for it,but this time responsibly. And so, here I am, and here I will be. I hope to share some more success stories as my children, my new adoring and patient (very patient) fiance, and I go through this thing together.
Thanks for reading,
March 10, 2018 at 11:35 pm #128678
- This topic was modified 3 months, 2 weeks ago by chris80hd.
That Guy with ADHDParticipantMarch 10, 2018 at 11:35 pmPost count: 125
Thanks for your view from the trenches Chris,
I always appreciate it when people can speak from experience. Please keep us informed as you progress through your journey through ADHD, relationships, and life in general.
AKA That Guy with ADHDMarch 11, 2018 at 10:10 pm #128679
chris80hdParticipantMarch 11, 2018 at 10:10 pmPost count: 5
Thanks Richard. I was happy to find this site, and encouraged so far in reading the materials and blogs.REPORT ABUSEMarch 15, 2018 at 5:04 am #128701
andreaaaaaahParticipantMarch 15, 2018 at 5:04 amPost count: 16
I am off all my pills now but I know that my ADHD pills definitely helped me finally complete a college degree at age 32-33. I had to get my GED because I dropped out of high school. If I had been diagnosed properly earlier in life I honestly believe I would not have struggled so much as I did in school. Of course, whatever doesn’t kill you can make you stronger.. or whatever they say… but EFF that! I wasted so much time and an accumulated student loans just dicking around with like 6 college attempts total. And I tried.. I absolutely do not want pills in my body anymore but they really helped me do school. And with pills like Adderal, they don’t need to be taken daily. I rarely took mine in the summer or holidays. Anyway.. just from another perspective.March 15, 2018 at 12:56 pm #128703
bareeraParticipantMarch 15, 2018 at 12:56 pmPost count: 2
Hi Everyone, How are you all. Myself Bareera nice to meet you.REPORT ABUSEMarch 15, 2018 at 6:56 pm #128704
That Guy with ADHDParticipantMarch 15, 2018 at 6:56 pmPost count: 125
Welcome to the forum!
I would like to say everything is OK but I would be lying. How are you doing?
AKA That Guy with ADHDMarch 19, 2018 at 6:44 pm #128711
chris80hdParticipantMarch 19, 2018 at 6:44 pmPost count: 5
Thanks for the insight. I have not taken ADHD medication since I was a child; currently I am fighting my way through the withdrawals of Effexor (wouldn’t wish this on my worst enemy). I plan on detoxing my body for a month or so, and then revisiting taking ADHD medications. I am at the point right now where I need help; I am hanging on by a thread some days, and it takes 100% of my energy just to keep everything from completely falling apart.
ChrisMarch 23, 2018 at 5:20 am #128721
That Guy with ADHDParticipantMarch 23, 2018 at 5:20 amPost count: 125April 4, 2018 at 12:58 am #128768
sharnParticipantApril 4, 2018 at 12:58 amPost count: 1
Hi, I am new here and really struggling.REPORT ABUSEApril 4, 2018 at 4:38 am #128769
That Guy with ADHDParticipantApril 4, 2018 at 4:38 amPost count: 125
What kind things have you been struggling with?
AKA That Guy with ADHDApril 9, 2018 at 7:04 pm #128934
foxgloveParticipantApril 9, 2018 at 7:04 pmPost count: 6
I’m Foxglove – 39, female from the South West of England
I’ve been researching the fact that I could possibly have ADHD after yet another relationship breakdown, where he actually took me to one side afterwards and calmly suggested that I should look into ADHD as I seemed a lot like a friend of his who receieved a diagnosis as an adult.
At first I was really upset and offended, but as I started to look at some online tests and stuff, it really sounded a lot like me. I wouldn’t say I have the fidgettiness or hperactive element, but I definitely used to be incapable of keeping still. I used to party a lot, work hard (but change jobs and houses every 6 months or so) I’ve recently calmed down on that front, but I have a feeling this is to do with depression (undiagnosed also) I definitely struggle incredibly with procrastination, disorder, memory, chaotic house which I can’t keep clean, exhaustion, inability to cope with work (I’m self-employed but really failing at it, losing things. I just can’t keep on top of life (I can’t even get to the middle of life). I only have a place to live because my nan died and my mum is letting me live rent-free in the little cottage she had (my mum wants me to pay rent, but I can’t).
Oh, I’m also very impulsive (e.g. I married my yoga teacher when I was 3 months in India! That didn’t work out either…) and sometimes take risks
I can’t really remember how I was as a child. I wasn’t overly disruptive, but I know I never wanted to be in the house and I always wanted to be doing exciting adrenaline-type things. My intelligence mostly got me through school under the radar even though I struggled to ever do homework or revision. This all got harder as the subjects got bigger and you could no longer revise on the morning of the exam and still do really well. I delayed doing a degree because I knew I wouldn’t go to classes or revise. Eventually at 25 I did do one, but the dissertaion nearly killed me, as I tried to write the whole thing in a couple of days and I was late handing it in and had to bribe the receptionists with wine and chocolate to give me another half an hour to get in all in binders. I made a promise to myself I’d never do another degree again.
I’ve been bankrupt, and never had any money. But intelligence-wise I could probably do any job I put my mind to (as long as it didn’t need much memory :s)
I should probably go and ask for an assessment? But I’m guessing that’s hard with the NHS.
Thanks for listening, and sorry for going on a bit 🙂REPORT ABUSEApril 10, 2018 at 4:59 am #128948
That Guy with ADHDParticipantApril 10, 2018 at 4:59 amPost count: 125
Much of what you said is very familiar to me. Looking back I struggled with many of the same things you did, along with a number of comorbid disorders such as depression, anxiety, fatigue, etc.
Welcome to the forum! I hope you enjoy your visit. There are many good posts in here as well as the blogs and videos on the main site.
RichardREPORT ABUSEApril 10, 2018 at 7:55 am #128955
harry1ParticipantApril 10, 2018 at 7:55 amPost count: 41
Greetings, Foxglove,REPORT ABUSE
The folks who visit here always seem very nice, and there are great tools here.
I can do the mathematics for machine work, in metric or American standard, but I am about useless at finance.
Depression and a special ability to feel desolately alone in the middle of thousands of people. Oh, yeah.
Yard work. But only if it’s chainsaws, axes, and flame-throwers. I haven’t the patience for flowers and such.
Think nothing about going on. People here seem to listen, pay attention, (in spite of the accursed add), and care.
For all my (I will own this) failures at keeping it all straight, I tend to think the person with add/adhd actually knows more about self-discipline than the average non-add person, because we’ve HAD to all our lives just to hold even and survive.
Ring NHS and ask.
The very worst they can do is say no. Then you go to their office and beat them with a rubber chicken and challenge them to prove you don’t need assistance!
Keep moving forward. Never give in.
HarryApril 10, 2018 at 11:40 am #128962
foxgloveParticipantApril 10, 2018 at 11:40 amPost count: 6
Thanks guys. Rubber chicken at the ready!REPORT ABUSEApril 10, 2018 at 9:42 pm #128969
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